I had almost forgotten how different my experience was from other mothers' experiences.

Today I was at the weekly baby group I attend, and the other moms--most of whom have babies younger than Tyler--started talking about induction, and labor pains, and general labor/delivery stories. One woman said something like, "Mothers-to-be just never really understand that, no matter how much you plan, things never go exactly according to your plans." She was referring, of course, to women who have specific "birthing plans," etc.

But then I started thinking about how our family-building had taken such a detour. How can you ever possibly plan for being told that your baby will never live outside the uterus, and you have to make the impossible choice between terminating your pregnancy and carrying a doomed baby to term?

I decided I was going to tactfully share my story with the other women. But the opportunity never arose. They were all busy talking about epidurals and Pitocin, and my tale of woe would have been awkward and a conversation-killer. My closest friend in that group knows our story, but no one else does.

I really wish they knew that part of me.

Updates

Everything has been moving forward with both our home's sale and our new home. We were able to edge out the previous accepted offer, and we're moving in six weeks! I can hardly believe it. Of course, little doubts have inevitably crept into my mind, but I'm pretty happy with the situation. I think I'm just a perfectionist at heart...

Tyler has started solids, but isn't too happy about it. We moved pretty quickly from rice cereal to peas because he just could. not. stand. rice. cereal. It's still a battle to get much down him, but he must be eating something, because his poop has...changed. I'll leave it at that.

What I've been thinking about most recently is the green-eyed monster. You would have thought that envy would have gone away now that I have everything I ever wanted. Oh no. Now all the voices in my head keep on saying things like, "She's so lucky--she lives in a neighborhood where everybody has young kids. My new neighborhood isn't like that!" Or--"I wish my baby was an angel child like hers is." Or--"She has way more friends than I do. It's not fair!"

Oh, how I wish I could just be satisfied with myself the way I am. Alas, I think I am destined for a life of comparing myself to other people. I'm messed up. :)

Sold!

One week after we put our home on the market, we found a buyer. One week. If you were to compare the real estate market to the world of reproduction, we would be the Uber Fertiles. I am hesitant to even tell certain friends and acqaintances who have had their homes on the market for eons. We just got really, really lucky. We feel blessed.

After one day of searching, we also think we have found the house for us. They even accepted our first offer! (The house has been on the market for two years, with several price reductions.) The catch: There already is an accepted offer on the house, but it had a home sale contingency and a bump clause. In English: The family who has dibs on the house has 48 hours to decide if they want to (and can get financing) own two houses at the same time. We really, really hope they throw in the towel.

But all we can do is sit and wait...