It is the way of the world that just about any person can find someone else who "has things easier than she does."
I look at women who had a smooth route to parenthood (and, presumably, will easily have second and third children) and am envious.
Women who had to use IVF or other extreme measures to conceive are envious of me, who only had to use pills for my first pregnancy and miraculously conceived for my second pregnancy.
Women who were never able to have children are envious of those who have.
It is easy to say that one should be grateful for what she has. But, unfortunately, we are all human and can't help feeling sorry for ourselves every now and then.
My friend A's daughter, who turns 1 tomorrow, had 1 hour of fussiness while she was teething. That's all. Then, poof, she had one tooth, and another the next day. This is the same child who doesn't cry when she goes down to sleep and has had a predictable schedule since she was 1 week old.
Tyler, on the other hand, has now had a week of pain. He's absolutely miserable, and while I've tried all the remedies (please don't suggest more), the only thing I can do is wait for that darned tooth to break through. While he's a good baby, he definitely is susceptible to the typical trials and tribulations of infanthood.
I try so hard to just let it go, but I find myself resentful of my friend because she's never "had it rough." She easily became pregnant, had an easy pregnancy and has never once worried about her daughter's health. Call me a terrible person, but I find myself wishing she could go through a rough couple of years so she knows what it's like for the rest of us.
I'm glad this blog is now invite-only, because I wouldn't want somebody who hasn't been following my story to stumble on this post. I know I'm whining, and I know I should be grateful, but it's hard to stop comparing myself to others. I'm worried I won't be able to stop the comparisons when Tyler gets old enough to figure it out. I just don't want to be one of those mothers.
I wish I weren't so damned competitive.
