First off, I have been so self-involved over the past week that I have neglected to thank whomever wrote a Secret Ode to me on Mel’s blog. That truly made my day. Sometimes, I wonder how much I should talk about my faith for fear of offending someone. Then, I think that even if some of my readers don’t share in my spiritual beliefs, perhaps my faith can help them grow in their own way.
M and I are so proud of ourselves. For the first time ever in this TTC process, we have actually been aware of ovulation when it is happening and have been able to time sex accordingly--the day before, the day of and the day after. And both of our bodies worked the way they should work! (M, if you’ll recall, was having performance issues related to medication. He’s changed medications, and things are mostly back to normal.) From my temping, I figure that I probably did indeed ovulate on CD13. CD13! That never happens for me!
That said, I wouldn’t be Ann if I didn’t have some type of neurosis left. Like Geohyde, my initial temping after ovulation was less than satisfactory. My temps hadn’t risen much, and by last night, I had started to convince myself that my RE was wrong and I hadn’t ovulated after all. I was terrified my temperature would dip this morning. Fortunately, it rose and all my fears were for naught.
I am also experiencing some sort of post-ovulation withdrawal, similar to Ultimatejourney’s. We have done everything we can this cycle, and now all we can do is wait. I realize that all of you go through this each and every cycle; indeed, that is what the 2ww is all about. But I’m not used to it. I’m used to actively pursuing ways to force my body to work correctly. I’m not quite sure what to do with myself now that our efforts have actually paid off and I at least have a chance in hell of getting pregnant. What do I do with myself now???
Unfortunately, M is out of town on business Thursday through Tuesday, which doesn’t help in distracting me. I’m trying to arrange some “playtime” with a new friend, and hopefully I’ll be able to meet my parents, who live two hours away, for dinner or something on Sunday. Please, go quickly, 2ww!
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8 comments:
It is such a buzz just to ovulate when you haven't been doing so. I still worry, every month, if it'll happen or not and its not been an issue for me for years. It is a kind of little miracle.
The fact that you KNOW everything has worked and you know the timing was perfecr is a massive deal. Of coure it'll be a long 2WW but a hopeful time. That's the way it should be, with a positive ending. x
Doesn't it feel good to have all the bits and pieces finally do their jobs? It sounds like Femara works well for you...
oh, fingers crossed for you that the 2WW goes quickly and that your well-times boinking will doo the trick! isn't it SO exciting when our bodies actually do what they're supposed to?!!
I was hubby-less for my 2ww also! I hope yours goes by quickly and has a happy ending!
I don't totally trust temps if they're not "textbook" and cuz mine are rarely ever "textbook", when I do temp I'll temp way past ovulation to be doubly sure it really happened cuz little jumps are not nearly enough for me.
I hope that the stars were aligned for you this ovulation and that this agonizing 2ww pays off in the end. It is nice to know that at least your body was working correctly and the timing was good. However, keep in mind that even people who don't suffer from IF can take a few months to get a sticky bean (just in case you might need to think of this fact for comfort, which I hope you don't need to do).
Oh, I can fill you in with how a neurotic TWW goes, no troubles!
Step 1. Obsessively check panties for mucus every time you go to the bathroom, whilst furiously calculating where your little love-bean would be both in terms of cell division and location in your tube/uterus.
Step 2. Really obsess over point 1. A lot. Invent reasons to go to the bathroom to facilitate your habit. Fake gastro if needs be.
Step 3. After, say 7-8 DPO, obsessively pound our breasts for tenderness. Check them out in the mirror, do they look bigger? Squeeze into your smallest oldest bra so's you feel 'expanded'.
Step 4. Live in denial of any red stuff or cramps until it's too hard to ignore any more. Leave the house in white trousers, sans tampons, on 14DPO. When strangers start letting you know that you've had an 'accident', it's officially over.
Step 5. Rinse, and repeat next cycle.
:)
Please, 2WW go quickly. More importantly, please provide a BFP at the end!!
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